Nick's 2016 Predictions of All Kinds

Greetings. This page will include Nicholas's predictions pertaining to the 2016th year in the Gregorian calendar. Sports, politics, fake sports, and other things of note.

2016 MLB
AL East

Yankees (3) - This is a hunch, that they'll be back. No real basis whatsoever.

Blue Jays - They have a crazy lineup, I just feel like someone will get injured, and come stretch time (both 7th inning and late season) their below average pitching will let them down. They won't outscore all other teams by as much as last year and go on that crazy run to win.

Orioles - Scott that is a really surprising fact about the Orioles since 2012. I agree that it will not translate.

Red Sox - Similar to my Yankees hunch.

Rays - This team just has not much talent, and did nothing to remedy that. Possible worst in the AL.

AL Central

Indians (2) - I said I wouldn't do it, but their pitching is looking that good. Also, since the trades of Bourn and Swisher, and the arrival of Lindor they have looked like a playoff team and then some.

Tigers (4) - Just when everyone thought their era was over a la 2002 Indians, they signed a whole swath of good players and should make a triumphant return.

Royals - Surprised myself that i put them third, they were playing over their heads last year. Baseball Prospectus actually has the returning champs last. Bad starting pitching is harder and harder to overcome as the steroid era gets further in the rear view mirror.

White Sox - Will be interesting to see Todd Frazier outside of the smallpark. The team looks to improve over several futile years in which people predicted good things. More of the same.

Twins - My "2012 Indians" Candidate: Off to a great start last year and finished near .500 and well over their talent level. This year will balance that out.

AL West

Rangers (1) - A strong regular season team, I think they'll improve upon last year's surprising division win. I'm only picking them as the one seed because I don't feel right picking the Indians or Yankees as such.

Astros (4) - Young successful teams take a step back from time to time. This may or may not happen for Houston Keuchel and company, but they'll still make the playoffs.

Angels - This big money team has underachieved since the signing of Pujols. Like usual, I'll take them near .500.

Mariners - I've picked them to win the division (or even go to the World Series) the last few years, and they've been awful. This is their punishment.

Athletics - I like them, and Sonny Gray is a potential Cy Young. But nope.

NL East

Mets (1) - New York's pitching is the best in baseball and will take them to the top of this meh division with ease

Nationals - Like Scott said, this is an easy division to pick the order of. Harper and Scherzer will lead yet another failed attempt to replicate 2012's glory year.

Marlins - The can just exist and get third place. They can try really hard and get third place.

Braves - I'm also picking Atlanta over the Phillies, if only for Julio Teheran and Nick Swisher. I don't expect much from Bourn.

Phillies - Worst team in baseball again.

NL Central

Cubs (2) - Their time has finally come after some genius long term team building by Theo Epstein and company. Not really any holes on this team, except that whole curse thing.

Cardinals (4) - Somehow the stacked Cardinals are always as such, and the pitching rotation is insane. It might not be the gladiator's race that this division was last year, but it will still be very topheavy.

Pirates - See what Scott said.

Reds - Name four Reds players. Seriously, try without Googling. I can't and I live here. The fire sale has made a sacrificial lamb of Brian Price and it'll take a few years for them to hit .500.

Brewers - I put them below the Reds because my fiance and some friends like the Reds, and what's it matter with these two teams.

NL West

Giants (3) - I agree re: even year thing being hogwash, but they really did add some good pitching to already good pitching. Plus, Arizona has been my NL Seattle every time I pick them, and I just plain don't like the Dodgers.

Diamondbacks (5) - Zack Greinke always gets paid like the best pitcher that ever lived. He's good but that's pushing it. They have enough that if they avoid another horrendous start they can make the playoffs.

Dodgers - They remind me of their metro area mates in that money doesn't always translate to a winning team.

Padres - Meh

Rockies - Super meh

Playoffs

AL Wild Card - Astros over Tigers - Keuchel > anyone on the Tigers

NL Wild Card - Diamondbacks over Cardinals - Why not

AL Division Series - Astros over Rangers, 3-1 - Astros are actually the better team, and show it in a short series

AL Division Series - Indians over Yankees, 3-1 - In a rematch of the bug series, the Indians pitching wins out

NL Division Series - Cubs over Giants, 3-2 - Like I said, the even year thing is hogwash.

NL Division Series - Mets over Diamondbacks, 3-1 - Like the tribe, this pitching staff would have a hard time losing a five game series.

AL Championship Series - Indians over Astros, 4-3 - The Indians simply have the best rotation in the AL. Also, the whole AL is very middling, so I don't have an obvious choice as to who should win it.

NL Championship Series - Mets over Cubs, 4-3 - Same old, same old for the Cubs.

World Series - Mets over Indians, 4-2 - In a series that puts the two best rotations in baseball against one another, the Mets experience last year wins out. Also, their lineup is better. But go tribe of course.

2016 PWBL
The AL has a lot of parity, like the real AL, which makes it difficult to project. I can argue that all of the playoff teams from last year (New Jersey, Indianapolis, Wyoming, New York, and Lexington) all took steps back, and awful teams like Miami and California got better.

AL East

'''New Jersey Kabutos (Last year – 1st, 54-26)''' – Despite losing two of their starters, the Kabutos were able to keep their big three intact. Duncan, Tentacles, and Bradams will be tough to beat. Otherwise the team isn’t quite the team that won the AL two of the last three years. Adding Yoenis Festivus to the lineup won’t quite cancel out a shorter rotation and a weak (as seemingly always) bullpen. They should still win the division despite a lower win total.

'''Providence Anchors (Last year – 3rd, 48-32)''' – The Anchors failed to make the playoffs, and gave it away to surging New York in the final week last year. They haven’t lost anyone, and they added Freezie Sanders and (reluctantly) Buchanan Chafee. The rotation might almost match the Kabutos, but Rob Gronhorseski and the offense is not quite up to speed of the division champs.

'''New York Water Baseball Players (Last year – 2nd, 50-30)''' – The Players aren’t the team that went 29-10 in the second half last year, nor are they the crap team that trotted out Gruntilda Edwards the year before. The truth is probably somewhere in the middle, and I’m guessing they’ll be around .500. Dabathia is in rehab, and Gimaybe Smith is just awful, and the offense won’t average 8 runs per game to make up for it like they did late last year.

Miami Druggies (Last year – 5th, 29-51) – After a brief relocation scare (It was on the ballot to move the team to Colorado or Washington, but, man, voting is like justifying the system, man.) Miami might be the most improved team in the division, if not the AL.  They added Jeh Hedge and Polo Rubio to a lineup that was pretty decent already, and also Pirate Nose Robot Nose from the Chinese WBB League. They could replicate New York’s 2015, with a stacked lineup and utterly horrible, just horrible pitching. Also if you believe sports talk hype, LeBron Jimmy might go back there, though Nick doubt’s it.

Dover Propels (Last year – 4th, 44-36) – Speaking of relocation scares, Dover nearly moved to Savannah, until Tampa stepped up to do so. The Propels era was short lived, and this year will be another drop in total wins. Besides an aging Jeffrey Independence and a few batters, the team has mostly come apart. Like Propel, it’s still on the store shelves, but somewhere near the bottom.

AL Central

'''Cleveland Generals (Last year – 3rd, 49-31)  -''' I could see them winning 60 games, or 35. Maybe the Cavs themers win a championship, maybe Griffey III makes this rotation even more of a force, maybe there aren’t riots at the RNC. An extremely talented team on all sides of the ball, they have to put an entire season together before I can confidently pick them as the highest seed, but I’m doing it anyway.

'''Indianapolis Republicans (Last year – 1st, 51-29) – '''Lots o’ dysfunction going on here, with Donald Trumpet being a bit of a Kaepernick when it comes to listening to coaches, and S. Tablishment establishing a group in the locker room that is boycotting the slugger. Their bullpen is outstanding, starting pitching is good enough. I don’t think losing Santorum will be as big of a deal as some, because he’s been declining every year since his breakout 2012 season. They quietly added Paul Bryan, who had one of the highest OBP’s in the league last year. If somehow the dysfunction is solved by the midseason convention, they have the talent to win this division.

'''Lexington Generals (Last year – 2nd, 50-30) – '''Outside of Drew Breeze (who they have for some reason) the starting rotation was dismantled last year. Andy Dalpound is decent, but a mid-rotation guy at best. They will miss pitching coach Jack Hueson quite a bit. The lineup, based around A.J. Blue, will be good enough to get them around .500, even with Vontaze Imperfect’s yearlong suspension for being a d-bag.

St. Louis El Presidentes (Last year – 4th, 24-56) –Manager Barry O’Bama is calling it quits after this season, but the front office has obstructed nearly everything he wanted to do. Therefore, they’re bringing back the same team that won 24 games last year. They will prolly do the same this year.

Mobile Homes (Last year – 5th, 17-63) – Mobile hasn’t even had a pitcher worthy of being number 3 in the rotation since C.J. McAaron went to Lexington. Plus, outside of perennial Allstar Howard Tim, who is great at both, their offense and defense is awful. Expect him to be moved, and for them to be terrible. Shelly Dunktank still plays for them apparently.

AL West – Remember when this division was the best in WBB history, just 3 years ago?

'''San Antonio Something (Last year – 4th, 36-44)– '''They have a lot of talent, especially offensively, with the likes of Timothy Duncan and company. Now that the Astros and Rockets are good, they have even more to pull from, and it looks likely that Ted Sail will be back with them as well. Look for them to have a crazy fast start during the basketball playoffs, and hold off the rest of this middling division.

'''Alaska Blubber Nuggets (Last year – 3rd, 40-40) '''– Every time I pick them to struggle, they make it to the Earth Series, and every time I pick them to do so, they fall on their face a la Attack!! when he swings and misses and goes face first into the pool. So this year, I’m having them in the 40-45 win range and we’ll see what they do. I said nearly the same about the Mariners above. Not a coincidence, that.

Wyoming Oblongs (Last year – 1st, 44-36) – Peyton Personning’s retirement and Koga Osweiler jumping ship has certainly left this rotation lacking. The management hasn’t really done anything about it, same with the Broncos, this time it is a coincidence. I think they’ll join New York, Indy, Lexington, Alaska, and the yet to be mentioned Turkeys in the 40-45 win range. In this year’s AL, that should keep them competitive until the end.

Albuquerque Turkeys (Last year – 2nd, 42-38) – They’ve been yelling “young talent” forever. That talent led the west for most of last year before collapsing and missing out on their franchise first playoff appearance. I’m guessing a similar win total without all the drama.

'''California Melons (Last year – 5th, 26-54) – '''Out of nowhere, Stephen Cumin has become one of the best pitchers in water baseball. Behind him is a stellar rotation of Milwaukee Bumgarner, Derek Minivan, and they might draft a pitcher high to replace Kaepernate. They rival the best rotation in the AL, but their bullpen and lineup are so horrible that they will still have a below .500 record, though I predict more like 30 something wins.

NL East

'''Atlantic Ocean Dancers ''' - No explanation needed. They won the NL three straight years, and the Earth Series the past two. They lost nobody this offseason, and the younger players like Poseidon Sanders are now as elite as the rest of the lineup.

Savannah Ghosts – The last two teams to switch locales made the playoffs the following year (Tampa and Lexington). That means nothing to this prediction, but their starting pitching does. Matt Bryan, Julio Baghdad, Jameis Marlboro and Kirk Uncles make this a rotation in the tier just below the elite ones like New Jersey, the Dancers, Hawaii etc. That’s the good thing about the team moving locations frequently, they pick up players from many places.

'''Virginia Beach Jellyfish ''' - The opposite is true of the Jellyfish, the offense will surely carry the pitching, though it has gotten better in recent years with the addition of Cam Oldton, who gives them a legit ace for the first time since Tentacles signed with New Jersey.

'''Boston Red Solo Cups – '''The rotation is pretty meh after David Appraisal, but they will still be one of the best 4th place teams in the league, probably over .500.  This division Will likely have the highest win total in the PWBL. Capatalizing “Will” in “will likely” was an autocorrect and Boston now has Will Likely on their team.

'''Philadelphia Phillises ''' - Team is a pitching disaster and have almost nobody notable on either side of the ball. Sam Trotford is their opening day starter and it gets even worse from there. I think they’ll have the league’s worst record, surpassing even Moblie.

NL Central 

Youngstown Yizzous – The city name is appropriate because of all the young talent, mostly entering their third year. If oft-suspended Bailey DeCanine can stay on the field (he’s getting obedience lessons) this team might even improve after last year. Long time ace Peter Penguin and veteran John Kascratch are the only stalwarts left from the team that won perennial AL Central Pennants.

Barrie Brios – All hitting, no pitching. They’ll have to win a bunch of 8-7 games if they want to make it to the playoffs. Their core is ageing, like Baucoffeesta and Texiera, and it might be this year or bust for the Brios.

Detroit Democrats – This division is so difficult to predict, as I can see the teams in any order. The actual Democrats look to have a good 2016 by default, so the WBB ones might make some noise. Clint Hillaryton will probably be their opening day starter, despite being quite unpopular. Also, retirements and general malaise from the political process point to an average, if lackluster year.

Pittsburgh Accents – Like all of the above, I wouldn’t be surprised if Pittsburgh won the division. This might be one of the last dominant years with Roethmorehotdog in ace form, and there isn’t much behind him in the rotation. Offensively they might be better, with Le’Vion Ding and Andrew McCutcheek and Antonio Tan in the middle of the order.

Totemsburgh Poles – Confusing team. Popular one for non Nick and Scott pundits to improve drastically, after getting Todd Friends from Lexington. I’m just not sold on that lineup otherwise, eha eha.

NL West

San Diego Shark Weeks – Last year they set a record for most wins in a season, and everyone forgot because they lost abruptly (again) in the playoffs. Hopefully that happens to an NBA team from the same state this summer. This roster is stacked, with three aces atop their pitching staff, and debatably the best lineup, though Dancers fans might have something to say about that.

Hawaii Pineapples – Another of the elite rotations, with Aaron Rojers being their 4th starter, they might even be better than New Jersey and Ocean. Unfortunately the lineup is average, so over a long season they might win and lose a lot of 2-1 games, but if they can get into the playoffs they’ll be a threat, especially with their experience.

'''Los Angeles Drowners – '''Do they get Rams players? Probably not Chargers players, as it’s still reasonably close, but I guess they now have Nick Empties and Todd Effeminate, not that the former is worth much anymore. No way will they repeat last year’s surprise, but the days of them being a laughing stock, as they were for the league’s first decade, are over for now.

'''Tijuana Bordercrossers '''– Controversial player Donald Trumpet has threatened to banish them from the league if he becomes the player’s union representative. That said, they added a bunch to their roster in order to try to win now. The talent is better than last year, but all the chaos might be too much.

Las Vegas Debtors – Ross Defecitwiler was just forcibly signed as this team still reels from the Kovacs deal, despite them finally being rid of his contract last year. Also Chumlee Bainbridge was arrested and subsequently dropped. Not a lot of good to look at with the Debtors this year.

Playoffs:

AL:

1)      Cleveland

2)      New Jersey

3)      San Antonio

4)      Providence

5)      Indianapolis

NL:

1)      Atlantic Ocean

2)      San Diego

3)      Youngstown

4)      Hawaii

5)      Savannah

AL WC: Republicans over Anchors – Anchors can’t use their deep rotation in a one game series, and their offense will have a tough time getting going against Blessing and the GOT’s strong bullpen.

NL WC: Hawaii over Savannah – I seem to predict Rocket over someone every year for the wild card game. Why break tradition. Hawaii becomes the 3 seed by virtue of a better record than Youngstown

ALDS: Cleveland over Indianapolis (3-2) – This should be close, but by no fault of GM Scott Abbraccio’s, 2016 just doesn’t look like a good one for Republicans, real or fictional. Cleveland’ stellar young rotation will get the best of em, just like Cleveland in July will get the best of some Republicans, we just don’t know whom.

ALDS: New Jersey over San Antonio (3-1) – By this time, San Antonio might be limping into the playoffs with an ageing core and no basketball season, and an irritated Ted Sail. Kabutos can throw only Duncan, Tentacles and Bradams if they need to and should win easily.

NLDS: Atlantic Ocean over Youngstown (3-1) – Maybe Youngstown steals a game, but just as likely maybe not. This should be a pretty confident pick.

NLDS: Hawaii over San Diego (3-2) – They seem to face off every playoffs, and San Diego might need to think about a coaching change after a 5th straight season with 60 wins and nothing to show for it.

ALCS: Cleveland over New Jersey (4-3) – Pitching will be front and center in this series, and I’ll pick the younger, less known, higher ceiling-lower floor team to win. This will seem like an upset, despite Cleveland being the one seed.

NLCS: Hawaii over Atlantic Ocean (4-2) – It’s tough to three peat, and the time change involved might mess with any preconceived advantage either team has. Still, this might go against my better judgement. Clearly, it’s a pitching league, as I have the four best rotations in the PWBL in the championship series.

Earth Series: Hawaii over Cleveland (4-2) – The young Cleveland team isn’t quite ready for the big time, and Hawaii’s been here, done this. Pineapples got hot at the right time throughout the playoffs, and end up winning their 6th Earth Series. This iteration of the Generals will be back, provided General doesn’t get sold and the franchise with it.

NFL
 

☀AFC East

1.      Patriots – New England is the only complete team in the AFC. I don’t care if Jimmy Garoppolo, or however that’s spelled, starts for half the season, they should have no problem capturing the 1 seed.

2.      Bills – Tyrod Taylor is an average quarterback, but Rex Ryan has made it to the AFC Championship twice with an average quarterback. The Bills have a good defense, and Watkins might actually put an entire year together this time around.

3.      Jets – They don’t deserve to be here, but somehow they’ll win 7 or so games.

4.      Dolphins – I don’t have a strong opinion on the Dolphins either way, but it seems like Ryan Tannehill has been in a “show me” year for the entirety of Obama’s second term.

AFC North

1.      Steelers – Barring an injury to Large Ben, Pittsburgh is the obvious second best AFC team. Antonio Brown is ridiculous, and Bell will be back soon enough. Unlike when I was in college, the Steelers will have to rely on their offense to get them back to the playoffs.

2.      Bengals – Is there anything that I could predict for the Bengals other than losing in the first round of the playoffs? You don’t mess with tradition. Marvin Lewis had a chance to help break this cycle by cracking down on the idiots on this team. He didn’t. Mike Brown had a chance to help break this cycle by cracking down on Marvin Lewis. He also didn’t. So here we are.

3.      Ravens – I expect the Ravens team that closed out 2015, not the one that started it. Flacco is passable but this team isn’t that interesting this year.

4.      Browns – Once again, why mess with tradition. They’ll win at least one more game than last season, how could they not? Though the defense couldn’t stop Edna, at least the Browns have a somewhat talented quarterback and three athletic receivers, albeit each with a big question mark.

AFC South

1.      Colts – Andrew Luck has to bounce back from 2015 or the team has a problem. The receivers are aging and running back is not set in stone. That defense isn’t all that either. I’m choosing them first because of what they did in 2012-2014.

2.      Jaguars – Well what do you know? This is what happens when you draft solid receivers high in one draft, and a competent quarterback in the next. You turn around a team very quickly. Ray Farmer missed this day in class. Since the AFC is the conference version of the water baseball AL West, they have a chance to contend.

3.      Titans – Mariota shook off that rookie nonsense last year, and I actually think DeMarco Murray will fit well in this offense.

4.      Texans – I wasn’t a big Brock Osweiler guy when he was playing with that ridiculous line in Denver. I especially don’t buy in with this team. Houston keeps trotting out Brian Hoyer and other Brian Hoyery quarterbacks and for some reason expects to contend.

AFC West

1.      Raiders – Carr, Cooper and Murray lead an exciting young offense that can take advantage of a weak division and take a step into the playoffs. Khalil Mack is a beast and Cleveland should’ve drafted him.

2.      Chiefs – Picking them second by default. And that’s all there is to say about that.

3.      Broncos – They won the superbowl with Brock Osweiler and the ghost of Peyton Manning behind center. They can at least not finish last with what’s his name starting. I could see Paxton Lynch playing quarterback by the end of the year, in a very fortunate situation – excellent supporting cast and no longer the guy who replaced Manning.

4.      Chargers – The Bosa crap will probably blow over, so I’m not going to fixate on that. The talent says that they could challenge for the division, but it’s concerning how bad San Diego has been for the last few years.

2016 Election
Electoral vote: Clinton 329, Trump 209

Popular vote: Clinton 48.5%, Trump 44.5%, Johnson 5.5%, Stein 1%, Others 0.5%

Alabama – Solid Trump. One of his highest margins.

Alaska – Alaska has been solidly republican for years, but is a bit of a mystery this year. It is full of Libertarians who generally don’t like Trump, despite Sarah Palin being on board. That said, I think he will win this but by less than 5%, easily the smallest margin by a Republican in decades.

Arizona – The hispanic vote has been high everywhere, John McCain dislikes his party’s nominee. I struggle with this one, but I’m going to say it goes GOP in 2016 but becomes a legit swing state starting in 2020.

Arkansas – Trump with a sweep of the A states.

California – Clinton, with the only question being if she will win Orange County, the first dem to do it in a long long time. I say yes.

Colorado – I’m not sure how this can be as close as the polls say; the entire state is Hispanics and hippies. Clinton easily.

Connecticut – Clinton without much discussion

Delaware – Same. These folks are just Biden time for political relevancy.

District of Columbia – Clinton. The establishment. Duh.

Florida – Here’s one of the big ones. Both can win without it, but the path for Trump is quite difficult. My prediction is that Marco Rubio wins. Presidentially? This is seriously too close to call. I’ll go with Clinton by a 2000y margin.

Georgia – At Clinton’s highest points, Georgia was in play. It’s another wait 4-8 more years state for Democrats. It’ll be closer than in the past, but not as much as Arizona. Trump by 4-5.

Hawaii – We’ll all be sleeping, but it’ll go Clinton

Idaho – Trump landslide, with a decent showing (more than 5%) for third party.

Illinois – Obviously Clinton

Indiana – Obama took this state as recently as 2008 but it’s not going to be close – Trump by double digits.

Iowa – Iowa’s been a swing state forever, but not this year. Trump runs away with it.

Kansas – There’s a surprising liberal faction in Kansas, probably due to the highly educated population. Expect it to go Trump, but not in a landslide like its neighbors.

Kentucky – My new home state will go Trump, except greater Louisville, Lexington, and hopefully 41071.

Louisiana – This state will shout “Geaux Trump”

Maine – Maine is Trump’s Georgia – as in previously solid opponent’s state that will be way closer than imagined, but not quite a swing state. Clinton wins by less than ten, though I do think Trump gets the one vote for district 2.

Maryland – Clinton.

Massachusetts – Clinton for days.

Michigan – Another important part of Hillary’s “Blue Wall” and probably the most vulnerable outside of Pennsylvania. I think Clinton squeaks by in that state up north.

Minnesota – From experience, I can say that it’s pretty much Canada, and will go liberal like actual Canada.

Mississippi – Trump easily.

Missouri – This is the hipster’s Iowa. Or at least whatever the Republican version of a hipster is. It did in 2012 what Iowa is going to do this year. Trump by ten.

Montana – Lots of white liberals here, but they are still outnumbered by Republicans in the eastern portion of the state. Obama actually almost won it in 2008. Will be Trump, but not as much as Idaho and the Dakotas.

Nebraska – The only part of this state Clinton can compete for is the 2nd District, which is worth one point. I don’t think she’ll get it, though it’ll be close. Trump wins statewide in a landslide.

Nevada – The early vote looks very very good for Clinton, despite the polls calling it a horserace. Bold prediction is that the hidden Hispanic vote gives it to Clinton by at least 4.

New Hampshire – I’ve been wavering a bit here, probably the toughest I’ve had to pick other than Florida, but way less important. The liberals here are super liberal, the republicans here are more Rand Pauly. I’m going to say Trump by a sliver but I’m not confident in this at all.

New Jersey – Chris Christie has made sure this state goes Clinton. It was going to anyway.

New Mexico – Clinton easily.

New York – See the two above “New” states.

North Carolina – Out of nowhere, North Carolina has become arguably the most important swing state, for Trump especially. It’s very divided, with lots of far right and lots of far left. Lots of uneducated whites, lots of college graduates and minorities. A microcosm for the entire election. Early vote favors Clinton, and I think she’ll squeak by.

North Dakota – Trump wins both residents of this electorally irrelevant state.

Ohio – This is the least important Ohio has been in an election in any millennial’s lifetime. The liberals in the 3 C’s (and Athens) won’t quite be enough to counteract the Trump votes in the hinterlands. Trump wins by 2.

Oklahoma – Possibly Trumps biggest margin of victory outside of Wyoming.

Oregon – Hipsters for Clinton.

Pennsylvania – This state can mean “Ehhhhverything….” to Trump. If he can win it, he probably steals the election. If not, very little chance. He doesn’t – but it’s close.

Rhode Island – Clinton wins Frank Anchor’s state.

South Carolina – An outside chance that this is the only state that borders an ocean (not a gulf) that goes for Trump. I don’t buy it (see Georgia, Alaska) but an interesting thought. Trump by 8-10.

South Dakota – The closer of the two Dakotas, but Trump by a lot.

Tennessee – Jimmy Haslam’s state goes for Trump by double digits.

Texas – This will be way, way closer than popular perception would have you think. I’m talking single digit win for Trump in what was once the most solidly Republican state of all.

Utah – The only four way race in recent American electoral history. For fun I will say McMullin wins, even though Trump is probably the logical choice. I will guess the following – McMullin 34, Trump 31, Clinton 22, Johnson 12, others 1. Fun to see how close that will be. I’m just kidding, swap McMuffin and Trump’s percentages.

Vermont – Clinton, with a small(ish) faction of Bernie write in votes.

Virginia – In a decade and a half Virginia went from red state to swing state to blue wall. Clinton wins by only 4.

Washington – Oregon’s equally hipster hat. Same results.

West Virginia – For a state that has a lot of local dems winning all the time, Trump wins by almost 20.

Wisconsin – Despite similar demographics to Michigan, Ohio and friends, the just don’t seem to like Trump here. (see the primary) Clinton wins this by less than Minnesota but more than Michigan.

Wyoming – Trump’s biggest margin of victory.

American Samoa – Who cares

Senate: Ends up tied at 50-50.

House: Not predicting specifics, but Democrats gain maybe 14 seats and end up still behind.

Totemsburgh City Council Ward 5: Brad Fini defeats Tropical Gustave by 2 points.

Trump concede if lose: Not immediately, but eventually yes.

Clinton concede if lose: Yes

McMullin concede if lose Utah: Yes

Fini concede if lose: Yes, eha eha

Beer drank because the election will finally be over: Edmund Fitzgerald leads Rhinegeist Truth by 4.

Election called by major networks at: 10:34

Trump’s use of “rigged” in speech on election night: 17

Browns wins this year: 1

The Gentlemen regular season wins this year: 9

Who starts for the Browns week 17: Me, toward the remote control, to change the channel.

I meant at QB: Kevin Hogan

Dem Nominee in 2020: Hillary Clinton

GOP Nominee in 2020: Marco Rubio

Last Prediction of the night: This one